“I see dark and I cannot write it.”

And then came the blow. Closely after;
the disintegration. And then I beg:

destroy me; I am nothing but a ticking
bomb with no timer and no matter
where I go, I am always two feet away
from falling off the edge and I’ve
wended away all those who can catch me.

Who am I? Call me miserable.
I am a degenerate trying to master the
art of calling myself complete without
my demons smirking at the falsehood
of that sentiment. I overflow with
discontent and bitterness. I am bed-
ridden in a bed of my own decadence.
Who am I? Call me lugubrious.
I am nothing but a self-paralyzing mess.
A mere helpless nuisance. My heroes
have hung up their capes and left me
to fend for myself.
Me? I am perhapsless.
I am constantly waiting for the whole
world to blow up in my face.

I am trying to heal, but I’m still
two feet off the edge and I’m reeling.

Rewire me.

 

– Disclaimer: The title of this poem is a line from Laura Stevenson & The Cans’ song “I See Dark”.

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