Like A Drug

I wrote this piece about a year ago. I had an idea for a story, and when I decided to sit down and write it, this is what I chose to write for the prologue. I ended up writing 25 chapters, and then I just stopped. My favorite part of the whole thing was this piece, so I decided to share it. If you’re interested in reading the rest, don’t hesitate in letting me know.

And note that this story is entirely fictional. Enjoy!

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I think it’s safe to say she had the bigger part of my heart.

Like Israel, she invaded my Palestine. Except she wasn’t aware of what she’d done, wasn’t aware of the damage, of the casualties. And all the other organs of my body hopelessly tried to fight it, but my heart was defenseless.

And it was sweet… Till it wasn’t.

I’ll admit, I willingly served it to her on a gold platter, but I didn’t except her to gobble it up. And gobble she did, as I watched her lick her perfect lips and smile in pure satisfaction. I watched her, and she watched me suffering. There was something so ironic about the whole situation, because as she clawed at me I wished it were the other way around.

I wished to be the one in control. I wished to have control over her soul. But I had already succumbed to her wishes and to her beauty. I was hers, even though she had no clue of it. Alas, she never wanted me.

But I wanted her. I wanted her with a passion that could easily kill a weakling. Not to say I wasn’t one, but being with her made me strong, and I knew that if I let go of that tiny shred of hope that I would inevitably crumble to pieces.

So I held on, unwanted. I held on when I should have long let go, and it hurt. Hurt because… well, you can’t exactly give someone your heart and then ask for it back, can you? So I guess I was waiting for her to be “polite” which was never really one of her strongest suits. And I couldn’t go on without a heart.

Or so I thought. Until I woke up one day and decided that my heart is something that I will be giving up. Like a drug, or so I tried to convince myself. Like an addiction, I had decided to quit it.

My name is Haley, and I am without a heart.

© Copyright 7ala Abdullah

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